Your Quest To Find You

 

Have you ever had the feeling you didn’t fit in? That you were from a different planet than your family, friends or colleagues?

 

Part of our quest in life is to find those we resonate with. Those we feel comfortable with. This is most obvious as we test ourselves in the world during adolescence as we ‘try’ to fit into different cultures, wearing different clothes, hairstyles, using different language to see what fits and feels most like our inner self, whether indie, hipster, hippie, genius, arty or geek…and we settle in to the new ‘village’ for a while, adopt the peeps and their habits and get involved in their mating rituals.

 

When it does happen it feels fine and works for a while and we adapt and change to suit the new way of doing things. At some point however, the amount of change required may be greater than the energy and desire to do so. The new life no longer fits like it used to and a shift occurs inside us. We look elsewhere, for what works better to satisfy that need deep inside – to belong.

 

As kids we accept this as a part of life, in the playground, at school, in sport, drama or dance class…we are looking for “our Tribe”, as prolific Mind-Body author Carolyn Myss terms it.

 

As adults we forget. We begin to feel a failure for ‘having’ to move on when the job depletes us, the path is unfulfilling or the partner no longer shares our values.

 

Everyone around us seems to have the perfect job, to be on track, to have the perfect relationship. In feeling resentment and fear of more loss, we forget everyone has their own path, that what they show and what is really happening are often worlds apart and NEVER to compare. We also forget we are looking for the unique – what is best for You.

 

After a day working with clients struggling with all this, the Meditation class that night asked me a question, I commented and they then replied “…sure Deb, but Others don’t look at things that way”.

 

Amused, my response was “You know, this isn’t the first time I’ve been told I look at life differently to Others.” They laughed.

 

Now I am comfortable and happy with knowing I look at life differently. It wasn’t always that way….

 

In fact I thought I fitted in at school until I met up for lunch one day a couple of years ago with my Best Bud. When we talked about the kinesiology and mediumship work I do her comment was, “That makes so much sense…if anyone else in our group said that’s what they did it would sound like a lie…with You, it makes sense.”

 

“ But why? I was like the rest of the group wasn’t I? “ I replied, a little perplexed.

 

She patted my arm like a dear friend, “Well, let’s just say we love you because you are a bit different, always have been.”

 

“ And all this time I was trying to be NORMAL, thinking I used to be…and lost the hang of it.”

“Nup, you were always You.”

 

I chuckle quietly to myself about that now, but at the time was surprised that I wasn’t the normal teenager I thought I had been.

 

I was VERY aware of my discomfort on my first day at Teachers’ College, that I was in the wrong place but made a choice to follow others expectations of me. Everytime we let what others think, feel or expect of us affect how we value ourselves we deplete our inner worth.

 

On graduation I moved into a Corporate career and felt more comfortable. Now I realise it was because most of those around me undervalued themselves too.

 

I still didn’t feel at Home or Purposeful or Fulfilled. So in my search for MORE I eventually found kinesiology. My initial studies in Touch for Health, a foundation stream, really didn’t interest me much at the time…it’s worth has proven itself since.

 

However, when I started the next stream called Three In One, I knew I had found my path. This is the stream of kinesiology that connects the emotions/ feelings behind  health, illness and injury. That the the way we feel about life, our emotional reactions can create health, imbalance or dis-ease. I had been searching for this all my life. I was HOME.

 

I still have a very clear memory of being consumed with a sense of being in the perfect time at the perfect place on the first morning of this course and still NOW have a very clear image of a window being gently blown open and fresh air and sunshine pouring into my mind, heart and spirit.

 

These sensations are a part of the reason I am so passionate about You finding Your Path, the work and life You love and that gives You Purpose.

 

In this workshop I learnt how to use the life changing tool known as the Behavioural Barometer…the emotional defusion technique we use in clinic sessions to release the old emotional patterns so you can step into who you are in your heart of hearts and true nature, taking you from feeling No Choice to being in a state of Choice and out of stress. The co-creator of this tool and technique and Three In One Kinesiology, Daniel Whiteside, died recently leaving this beautiful and life enhancing legacy that I am so grateful to be able to share with you, to enhance Your life.

 

Even after almost 15 years of using the barometer process with clients daily, I still hear,

 

“ Yes Deb, that is exactly how I feel “ when we find the negative emotions to clear and release and then “Yes, that IS Me” when we find the essence of your true nature. What an amazing tool for positive change the Behavioural Berometer is!

 

9 years after this workshop I came upon Neuro-training, created by kinesiologist  Andrew Verity, integrating kinesiology with the homeopathic healing process. These new learnings revolutionised the way I practice kinesiology and the profoundly improved the results clients receive.

 

This healing principle says, the way we think, affects the way we feel, which affects the way we do life and the energy we have for life. Andrew’s continued research and development continue to expand and develop Neuro-training/ kinesiology…something we all benefit from.

 

Some people are born wearing their brand of uniqueness comfortably and proudly, like imminent Australian artist John Olsen, who radically changed the face of Australian art. I saw him earlier this week being interviewed by Edmund Capon, former director of the Art Gallery of NSW. Capon asked Olsen what he thought of his contemporaries who at the time called him crazy, mad, insane for creating his revolutionary new style.

 

Without hesitating Olsen quipped, Well it’s their problem isn’t it, not mine.

 

Too true!

 

Other people have the ability to shift from feeling like the Ugly Duckling into the realisation they are a Swan, mixing with the wrong crowd. When they find their fellow Swans they find Home.

 

Most of us need some help or like to make the process easier, gentler and be living the life we are meant to sooner. And that’s where the kinesiology comes in.

 

As don Miguel Ruiz says in The Four Agreements,

 

“Every day we awake with a certain amount of mental, emotional, and physical energy that we spend throughout the day. If we allow our emotions to deplete our energy, we have no energy to change our lives or to give to others.”

 

The research and work of Daniel Whiteside, Andrew Verity and so many before them and since allow You and I to have the energy to change our lives for the better and to give to others. It gives us the CHOICE, and that’s what Living is all about.

 

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A 5 Minute Story

 

This week’s 5 Minute story also comes to us from the Toltec healer don Miguel Ruiz’s book The Four Agreements:

 

“Just do your best- in any circumstance in your life. It doesn’t matter if you are sick or tired, if you always do your best there is no way you can judge yourself. And if you don’t judge yourself there is no way you are going to suffer from guilt, blame, and self-punishment. By doing your best, you will break a big spell that you have been under.

 

There was a man who wanted to transcend his suffering so he went to a Buddhist temple to find a Master to help him. He went to the Master and asked, “Master, if I meditate four hours a day, how long will it take me to transcend?”

 

The Master looked at him and said, “If you meditate four hours a day perhaps you will transcend in ten years.”

 

Thinking he could do better, the man then said, “Oh Master, what if I meditated eight hours a day, how long will it take me to transcend?”

The Master looked at him and said, “If you meditate eight hours a day, perhaps you will transcend in twenty years.”

 

“But why will it take me longer if I meditate more?” the man asked.

 

The Master replied, “You are not here to sacrifice your joy or your life. You are here to live, to be happy, and to love. If you can do your best in two hours of meditation, but you spend eight hours instead, you will only grow tired, miss the point, and you won’t enjoy your life. Do your best, and perhaps you will learn no matter how long you meditate, you can live, love and be happy.”

 

EnJOY!

 

Be kind and true to You,

Deb