Let Go of ProcrastinationOver the last few weeks I’ve been hearing a lot from clients about procrastination in the last few weeks as if it’s a bad thing.
Whether you are having trouble starting or your work has ground to a halt, what you are calling Procrastination can actually be working to support you.
Most often we think Procrastination is a struggle with our willpower and begin to whip ourselves for feeling weak willed or not being stronger mentally.
Motivation for Change
In kinesiology/ neuro-training terms it can be low Motivation for Change…one of the measurements I take at the beginning of your Personal Consultation when it is often low 0 – 5% and increases to 81-97% at the end of your session after we have released the negative mental/ emotional/ energetic patterns blocking it’s ability to flow easily.
Does this sound familiar? You know logically what you need to do, may have plenty of energy to do the mental work, no energy to action it? You make excuses when you’ve promised yourself “ I’ll start Monday”? and then Tuesday, Wednesday with no start in sight?
Motivation for Change is the energy and ability to do things differently. If the old ways no longer work we need Motivation for Change to make the changes necessary to make progress.
Resistance to Change
When you lack clarity around what is negative change and what is positive change your progress slows and you stall.
Your misperception and fears can cloud your belief that whatever you are working on will create such great Change that you fear your ability to handle it. You focus on what you may lose as a result of Change and how others will perceive you as a result.
It is important to remember that Positive Change is positive and in support of you and your goals. When you ask yourself these 2 questions you become very clear about the change you are creating and get rid of the rest:
Is this positive and in support of me?
Is this positive and in support of your goals.
A solid and clear Yes to both questions is Positive Change. Anything else you let go and move on.
If you have difficulty with this, it’s time for your next session to create the Positive Change you seek.
Where Am I Going?
The brain likes to know where you are heading . It likes a Vision, a BIG picture. AND it likes to be emotionally committed to it. Then it can create a strategy to get there.
That’s Foresight. Vision + Strategy.
It’s also where most people grind to halt. They create a sensible goal without an emotional attachment and wonder why they stall.
The brain LOVES You creating a strong emotional commitment to your Vision.
You know how this works already…you’ve become so emotionally committed to fear at times that you have driven yourself into a field of mud and get stuck. Or worse, find yourself down a big dark hole, and become blinded and stuck. That was through your emotional commitment to worry and fear. So turn it around….
Remember the first time you did something you LOVED? The first car you loooonged for? Your first trip OS? You imagined and imagined and imagined what it would feel like living it, how amazing you would feel…how it would complete you, make you worldly/ sophisticated/ fulfilled/ completed/ wanted. YOU KNEW that car, that trip was the answer. The moment you committed to the path of owning the car, being on your trip… your brain registered the intensity of emotion and created the brain reward pathways you needed to create the strategy to make it happen.
And it was so strong you started to attract people who had cars like that, had been to the places you wanted to travel to…all adding information, advice, sometimes help to make the Vision you committed to happen.
You’ve done it before, do it again…
Imagine how it will feel when you are living and breathing your project and life is JOYful and flowing. Write it down.
Do it again and again adding more each time…and really feeling it, KNOW that it’s done. Because Your Older, Wiser Self is already LIVING and LOVING it!
Exercise: Head hold and breathe and go into the future to become BFF with your Older, Wiser Self…notice the life they have created for you and how much they are enjoying it.
Then say Thank You Thank You Thank You! and repeat 3 times “ I return to Present Time, right here, right Now”.
Give yourself a 12 second hug to integrate your new learnings and reward yourself with lots of oxytocin, that loved up hormone that kicks in at 12 seconds and gives you the loving feeling that makes life flow easily.
What’s it All For?
A sense of Purpose, doing what you love that also benefits others is key to tapping in to the flow of Life.
Procrastination can come from a disconnect with Your Purpose in the project at hand…how can others’ benefit from what you are doing? Is it something You Love?
Once you are clear within yourself, have a sense of KNOWING this it is right for you for now, then the energy starts moving again.
It’s important to check-in with this regularly in future before you grind to a halt with disconnect. Being Your Beautiful, Authentic Self is the key.
Your Intuition Speaking
About timing: just as the sun rises and sets at precisely the right time each day everything in life has it’s own timing. Nothing happens before the precise time it is designed to. Sometimes we need to wait. Sometimes change direction. Sometimes call Time Out.
Your new mantra: It’s much easier to wait/ stop/ call it/ recalibrate when you know that,
“ The right solution/ healing/ process/ energy/ money/ direction/ moment/ people/ love/ resources etc arrive at the right time in the right way for me, and in the highest good of all concerned” . Pick you topic. Repeat 7 times, once a day for 7 days.
About listening: research and experience has taught me to sit with a feeling… this time procrastination, to feel it in my body, befriend it, talk to it and find out why it’s there and what it’s come to teach me. Procrastination arrives when:
We are over-doing it. Accept you are playing a looong game and need times to recuperate and feed your spirit before returning to the game.
Have you created your own deadline of “have to” through impatience or fear of loss.
Are you putting the needs of others before your own? Without self-care you could stay stuck, wondering what happened. Self care, self love and healthy boundaries help the energy to flow easily, positively and in support of you and your goals.
Wondering what others will think? Firstly, it’s none of your business what other’s think. Worrying about it will keep you stuck. Next, energy flows when you are Being your True Self…listening to and acting from your authentic self and highest good.
When you are pitching from the highest good all flows, others benefit and you begin to live your purpose.
When you are forcing things, hitting your head against a brick wall, pacing the floor, numbing yourself with booze, coffee, facebook/ Instagram, food or debilitating yourself with worry to a foetus position on the couch in front of Netflix you are procrastinating by disconnecting from Your True Self. Stop blaming Netflix, and the booze, food, coffee, facebook/ Instagram, food and anything else you use to distract your attention and deplete your energy from what is really going on in your life.
Sit quietly. Close your eyes, belly breathe for 9 breaths. Give yourself a hug.
Headhold and breathe…one hand across your forehead, the other across the bump in the back of your head. Belly breathe slowly IN for 4, hold for 2, OUT for 4, hold for 2, 9 reps….then hug yourself again.
It’s time to become your best friend…tell yourself you are safe, it will be okay and that you got this.
Promise yourself to DO Something. Whatever you need you’ll do.
Whatever is causing the grind to a halt…you’ll listen, be kind and compassionate to yourself and validate all the reasons why you are procrastinating ( writing this conversation on paper and ripping it up after will help express it, validate it, release it and let it go).
Then ask yourself: What is the Next Step to getting the progress moving? It could be “Wait” or “ Sit and enJOY Netflix for 20 minutes”…which IS progress from sitting in a ball whipping yourself. You may get the picture or feeling or sound to prompt you to go for a walk outside, in nature; or to wash up, do the laundry, call a friend, have a salt water shower/ bath, head hold and breathe (so you can become lighter, Present, calm, clear and focused:)
What You Focus on Grows
Remember what you focus on grows…focus on feeling blocked and you will create it. Same with confusion, fear, sadness, self loathing.
How to stop the cycle?
Call the feeling for what it is, be specific…” I feel like shite” is too general. Better to be specific, “ I feel angry/ sad/ heavy/ stuck/ worthless/ useless/ a fraud”.
Once you call the feelings for what they are it creates a sense of validation.
You can then add what you want to be,
“ I want to feel clear, I am willing to be clear, I have clarity”
“ I want to feel calm, I am willing to feel calm, I am Calm, I am Calm, I am Calm”,
“ I want to feel focused, I am willing to feel focused, I am focused, I am focused, I am focused.”
You will notice the emotions and energy shift as you re-set your inner GPS to where you want to go and who you want to Be.
Bite size pieces
The bottom line? Ask yourself “What’s the next step”, then do it. Then ask again, then do it. No matter how small or pointless you think it is, do it. All of it is progress.
Listened to and acting on what is important to you tells your brain that you keep your promises to yourself & have your own back. It supports and grows your self esteem and self worth.
Reminding yourself, “You Got This”.
In the meantime, please be kind.
And True to You.